Going Home to Orlando, FL this past week was tough. I was apprehensive about going home with the new Knowledge I'd gained form Evergreen and Olympia, but I was unprepared for the Displacement I felt.
Many people don't consider Florida the South, per se, but if you travel about thirty minutes outside of any bigger city, it's like stepping bak in time. The race relations are as palpable as ever, gender essentialism is the norm, and classism is rampant. And if you think you're going to be revolutionary and challenge the System... you'll be lucky if you escape without encountering physical violence.
I've spent the last eight months reconciling my identity as a Black woman who is queer and from the South. It's taken me a long time to accept myself, and it's an ongoing process. Going back to Orlando put my queer identity under fire.
The rampant homophobia and disregard to homophobic comments put into rather harsh perspective the comfort I experience in Olympia and the Pacific Northwest in general. I was really forced to choose my Battles wisely, when faced with friends or acquaintances who made off-hand remarks that would get them shot down at Evergreen.
To the comments I chose to question, I feel I at least caused the Beginnings of deeper thought of assumptions. Or maybe not. Change comes slowly, if at all.
The hardest part was being invisible. White queers hardly get any recognition or acknowledgement, and being a person of colour, and queer.... No. The gay is something that only happens to White folk. Or it's just a phase. Or we'll beat it out of you.
If Olympia is my Theory, then Orlando is my Practise. It feels good to know that I made it through that difficult experience, and that I managed to keep my head above the Churning Waters. But it's definitely not somewhere I'm ready to return for an extended period of time. I'm not done with my Transition and Olympia most certainly is not done with me.
