I've been thinking a lot lately about romantic expectation, and how society expects everyone to--at some point in our lives--engage in a romantic partnership. It doesn't matter how brief or torrid or badly it ends--every single person has the script shoved on them and shoved down their throats from an early age.
And I am so completely done with that rhetoric.
I've been realising more and more how much i've been frantically scrambling to find what page of the script I'm supposed to be on because it feels like I'm reaching the point in my life where I'm supposed to be engaging in a romantic relationship, one that will lead to children, the purchasing of a home and all hat 'happily ever after' mess.
And I am so completely done with that shit.
I don't often experience romantic feelings, and I'm finding that I mistake romantic feelings for deep platonic friendship.
This isn't to say that i won't ever experience romantic love--I'm saying I am so through with trying to transform friendship love into something akin to a 'happily ever after'.
I am way happier when I'm not in the throes of a supposed 'crush', I love my friends and I have plenty of warm, cushy feelings about them.
Why am I trying to force romance when it clearly is not present? At least in the 'traditional' sense which, by merely existing, I am actively challenging.
I feel like me throwing this romantic love script onto the fire is me taking a huge next step in my process of unlearning.
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